Indignity of Aging

I am at high risk for a certain kind of cancer.  Thus, I am getting a certain kind of test done to my body about a decade before the general population is recommended to do so.  This test required me to not eat fruits or vegetables or high fiber of any kind for the last several days.  I ate white bread and cream cheese.   Now it requires me not to eat anything, but to stay hydrated.  I drink old-school Gatorade for calories.  Later today it will require me to drink two liters of rocket fuel which will cause some sort of incendiary propulsion to fire me into total internal emptiness so that some kind of doctor, using what I imagine to be a Jules Verne, steam-punk periscope, can see the very bottom of my insides.

It is important to take this test.  But, today, I’m feeling early onset indignity.

As I’ve been highlighting some of the artwork I can’t make of late, I thought Stephen McClurg’s Herbach drawing (based on a story we discussed a few years ago) to be particularly appropriate today.  This Herbach looks old.  This Herbach (the one typing) feels pretty old.  I’d like a soft warm scarf to tie around my neck.  Thanks for drawing one, old pal, Clurg.

Clurg's Comic


4 Responses to “Indignity of Aging”

  1. 1 Ralph Pennel March 7, 2011 at 2:06 pm

    had to do this last summer. good luck my friend. the day before is the worst part of the procedure. you wont remember anything after that.

  2. 3 Britt March 7, 2011 at 2:47 pm

    It’s great fun, Geoff! You get to watch the internal process on a little video monitor. It’s like sci-fi, but real, ya know? The doctor who “gave” it to me had a long Greek name, so I asked him, “Are you from Greece?” He said yes, and we chatted a while about our service in NATO. He was in the Greek navy, a submariner! Who woulda known? When we were finished, he told me, “You have the colon of an 18-year-old!” “Oh, really?” I said, “Maybe I should give it back.”

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I am…

Geoff Herbach. I am the author of Stupid Fast and Nothing Special, among a bunch of other stuff. When I'm not writing, I teach writing at Minnesota State, Mankato.

Stupid Fast

Nothing Special

I’m With Stupid

Fat Boy (Gabe Johnson Takes Over)

PowderKeg Stage

Herbach's favorite store

My Bizzle

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