The Steely Gaze of Cast Away Hanks

This guy is in one of his patentable downward spirals with regard to his exercise regime.  Generally speaking, this means the introduction of more and more cigarettes, in combination with piles of undone laundry and dirty dishes lying around the house, in combination with a sense that there is too much to do (there is a lot to do — teaching college classes sucks time up like decaying jack rabbit sucks moisture from the earth).  But this guy doesn’t agree.  He’s not going down without a fight.  He’s throwing out the cigarettes, so as not to escalate (and maybe not be able to concentrate).  He’s doing laundry as he writes (one load to down, fourteen to go).  He’s staring at the dishes on the table filled with a week’s worth of dirty old dinner and he’s saying, look out, dishes… your time is at hand.  This guy knows that Tom Hanks had to drop a thousand pounds to look like a cast away.  This guy knows what a good time Tom Hanks must’ve had humping it gazelle style around that island once he was light as a feather.  This guy knows it took Tom Hanks hard work to get there.  This guy takes inspiration from the steely-eyed gaze of Mr. Hanks himself.

Steely Mr. Hanks

Steely Mr. Hanks

Steely Mr. Herbach

Steely Mr. Herbach

And so, gym.  It’s on, as they say at the gym.  Nobody gonna break-a-my-stride.  I’m like a cast away giant sea turtle, a hundred and ten years into life…  I will survive.

Sea Turtle

Sea Turtle


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I am…

Geoff Herbach. I am the author of Stupid Fast and Nothing Special, among a bunch of other stuff. When I'm not writing, I teach writing at Minnesota State, Mankato.

Stupid Fast

Nothing Special

I’m With Stupid

Fat Boy (Gabe Johnson Takes Over)

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