This Guy Suffers From Tight Hamstrings

Suffer is the appropriate word.  Why?  Because my hamstrings hurt.  Often times, especially after exercise, they feel like they’re going to snap if I walk too fast.  One of my favorite things to do is to walk fast back and forth between rooms in my house.  After exercise, like the kind I did today at the YWCA, I can’t engage in that activity, because my hamstrings hurt.

What are the hamstrings? This picture sort of shows where they are located on one’s body.  That’s me in those sweat pants.  


Herbach Hamstrings In Sweat Pants

Herbach Hamstrings In Sweat Pants

If I were to take off my sweat pants, you might see something that looks like this.  The following graphic is not my buttocks and leg.  Hamstring here is labeled “Hamstring”.

238px-gray1239Hamstring, singular, refers to one of the tendons running up the back of one’s leg, between knee and buttocks.  Plural, hamstrings, refers to the whole group of tendons and muscles running between knee and buttocks.  Hamstrings also remind me of split pea soup.  Have you ever purchased ham that is inexplicably packaged in a string-like hair net?  My mother used to by ham for split pea soup like that.


Herbach's Bad Posture

Herbach's Bad Posture

Among causing myriad other problems, tight hamstrings can result in bad posture, because they pull the pelvis out of place.  My pelvis has been in the wrong place for as long as I can remember and my back hurts and my posture is terrible.  Tight hamstrings can also put This Guy in danger of suffering future tears and pulls, etc.  Nothing good about tight hamstrings.


"Hamstring Stripping"

"Hamstring Stripping"

There are various deep tissue massage techniques, like the one depicted above, and stretches that This Guy should be employing to loosen his tight hamstrings.  On this page you’ll find massage techniques, including a provocative video (oh, I’m sorry, they removed the video). These techniques are to help athletes return from a pulled hamstring.  My hamstrings are so tight I’d like to use the techniques proactively, so as to avoid injury.  I need to find a masseuse.  Or a friend with whom I could do such provocative massage techniques.


Hamstring Stretch

Hamstring Stretch

On this page, you’ll find the “best” hamstring stretch available.  Before I pay a masseuse or threaten to lose a friend, I’m going to trying doing this stretch a lot.  If that doesn’t work, I might try “the monkey,” which is apparently an associated stretch. 

Hopefully, with a little due diligence, my hamstrings will get longer.


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I am…

Geoff Herbach. I am the author of Stupid Fast and Nothing Special, among a bunch of other stuff. When I'm not writing, I teach writing at Minnesota State, Mankato.

Stupid Fast

Nothing Special

I’m With Stupid

Fat Boy (Gabe Johnson Takes Over)

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Herbach's favorite store

My Bizzle

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