How Herbach got his groove back.

One way to feel good about life is to spend a lot of money.

There are places in this world known as Bed and Breakfasts. These are generally large, nicely appointed, old fashioned and romantic houses where a person like me can sleep in a big bed and bathe in lemon grass and be fed a nice breakfast among other bourgeois people of my ilk. At the moment, in order to recover from a long few months of book tours and online teaching, I am at one of these places in a famous, tiny and quaint and artsy (in a crafty kind of way), town in the state of Minnesota. I have been here 22 hours. I have slept 14, bathed in the lemon grass once, eaten breakfast on a screened-in porch while the sun played gently in my orange juice, and I’ve read a book of Victorian poetry. In some respects I’m like Diane Lane in Under the Tuscan Sun. In most other respects I’m like Dom Deluise in Cannonball Run.

Notice the wine and S.Pellegrino in my room? I smell like lavender.

I am at peace with the world (for around $300 I don’t necessarily have).

Here’s a question: if, in fact, some kind of bourgie Victorian fantasy world is what makes me happy and at peace, can I, Herbach, who does not do much around the house other than watch COPS, act to recreate some kind of bourgie Victorian fantasy world in my own space? Or, am I totally deluded? It’s the lifestyle question.

Lifestyle.  Isn’t lifestyle just what you do? Isn’t it just a compilation of one’s actions?  Why should I worry about bourgie or fantasy?  I do what I do and the message it sends to others (bourgie, perhaps) doesn’t matter.  I didn’t drive a HUMMER down here.  Everything in this place is antique and thus recycled.  I am responsible!  I choose lavender and bath salts!   I like watching sports on television!  I am every woman, Oprah!  I mean, I am myself!

I will do more of this. I was served a delicious breakfast burrito and cold-pressed coffee this morning. To health!

You should join me.

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I am…

Geoff Herbach. I am the author of Stupid Fast and Nothing Special, among a bunch of other stuff. When I'm not writing, I teach writing at Minnesota State, Mankato.

Stupid Fast

Nothing Special

I’m With Stupid

Fat Boy (Gabe Johnson Takes Over)

PowderKeg Stage

Herbach's favorite store

My Bizzle

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